M. hostilis & Syrian Rue
Citation: iliketoplay. "Psychic Network, and Mental Noise: experience with M. hostilis & Syrian Rue (ID 40012)". Erowid.org. Mar 29, 2005. erowid.org/exp/40012
Method of preparation:
I followed Mimosquero's recipe from Issue 2 of The Resonance Project.
I had prepared it on a sunday and froze it in a plastic air tight container till wednesday. I placed the container in a pot of water on a low boil to melt the brew. I then poured the brew in a small pot to warm it up and boil it down more.
I had learned from my last journey that if the lemon sits in there for about an hour it tastes slightly better. This time it was far too bitter, but the drinkable volume was very small (maybe 2/3 cup). I always dip my finger for a taste so I can prepare myself for the dosing.
Intake for the day:
I had some cereal and mountain dew. My venture was planned for mid day but was postponed until 10pm. I ate a grilled chicken sandwhich w/ mayo, some fries and more Mountain Dew. This was around 7:45
Home, alone upstairs. Angry GF downstairs.
Light work earlier then usual after a long night at the office. Did errands early afternoon. GF came home early which moved my plans of dosing mid day. She does not approve of my activities or religious focus. Cleaned house to be productive and win her over. Convince her to let me do it that evening, since I will not have a chance to do it later since I had been sick. I had a doctors apointment the next day, and expected to be prescribed antbiotics. Later, go shopping w/ GF and visit sister. Go home, GF whines and wants me to skip my session. I had already dosed when I got home. She becomes angry w/ me and gives me grief. I go upstairs to light candles and prepare and tried to calm down for the trip ahead. I also prepared to take a shower. I had read that the DMT spirit likes water, and I had not bathed in a couple of days and felt we both could use a shower for the onset of the trip.
(Note about myself)
I practice chi kung and have expanded into manipulating energy with my body and mind to heal myself. I also have a fairly open 3rd eye. I see energy as if it were water everywhere with just a little meditation. I have been studying methods in which to change physiology with energy and the mind and am in decent tune with myself. I have tried this mixture a few times before, but at a lower dose.
I gave thanks to the spirit of the plant for granting me the ability to go on my journey and giving itself unto me. I began to do some energy practices while I drank.
I got it down as quick as possible. It took a few attempts thanks to the bitter drink down. Drank over a 7 minute period.
Began to feel like something was coming over and decided to take a shower. I got a little grief from the GF right before going into the shower. I am not sure if this affected what happened next. My stomach tensed and I decided to abort this conversation. I felt as if I were going to vomit. I went and sat on the toilet in hopes of regaining strength over the pain in my stomach. I began using chi kung to move energy through my stomach and try to move the pain away and reduce the nausea.
Once settled, I lit a candle and turned off the lights. I got in the shower and tried to practice some breating exercises, and relax. As each time I get in the shower under the influence I have a brief struggle. I expected this time to be different since I thought the spirit liked water. I feel that this is more on me then a plant spirit. I had skips in time. Trying to perform a task, such as washing hair and ending up in another part of the shower. I tend to experience this when I do mushrooms. I do have a fear of drowning and can not swim. This may be the root to my struggle in the shower, it may be partial to my body rejecting the brew. Not quite sure. Once I finished showering I cleaned off and grabbed my clothes and water then went upstairs.
Being out of the shower I felt better, but still had some flutters in my stomach and was sort of disorientated, but mostly composed. I put on some music (Shpongle), and lit more candles, then put a black light in the upstairs bathroom. I felt better, and the nausea was much less. I sat indian stlye on the floor in my loft and began to meditate. I then began to focus on my body, and the energy around me. I was able to relax my stomach and take control over the pain. I could also feel the energy in a much more intense way. I could feel it at the top of my spine, and around me. I felt my face contort, and some slight euphoria. I tried to build some energy up in my hands and then release on my body. I then rose to my knees, and opened my eyes. The energy around me was very dense. Where I can see it as a clear water, now it was like thick streams of liquid glass. So quick and wrapping everything. I became so overwhelmed that I dropped to the floor, and against the couch. I grabbed some pillows designed for sitting up right and used those to lay on the floor against the couch.
I felt my body become overwelmed with euphoria. Like I was held by the life force of something, and engulfed in the energy that is around us. As it moved up my body, I felt myself slip away. I felt pulled inward. I would flash to here and now and inside my mind. At one moment I was here again and my neck was bent with face in my chest. Every time I have gone deep on any substance this seem to be how my body ends up.
Suddenly I am gone. I began to travel. I feel as though I am phasing into other worlds. They are all horrible places. I see murders, and battle. I see people I have never met, worlds of anger. I know to not let this influence me, and that this is all part of the journey.
I stop in one place that is full of detail. That is very lucid. That I am existing in. It is a land with long dusty roads and rocks lining the paths. It is covered by small hills and a long wall made of rough grey diamond shaped stone with beveled ridges. In between every other stone was eyes and bone that completed the wall. One thought that crossed my mind is this is where the elves are. I am not sure, but I felt the once joyful people of the dead land. It had been overthrown and at the end of the road is where the evil lied. I decided not to stay, I took leave, and rather than be dropped in another cursed land, I ended up inside myself. I felt connected to everything about myself. I bagan to see problems with myself, and issues with why I am in certain situations. I could feel my nervous system. I could travel down the intricate network of nerves in various parts of my body and move energy, reduce pain, and induce more euphoria. It seemed as I traveled more then better I felt. I shifted back to my head. After analyzing what was wrong with me, I found I can adjust it.
I saw that we were instilled with certain characteristics; paranoia, laziness, procrastinations--along with good characteristics. It was almost like we were designed to be the way we are. Which seemed to support other theories of mine. I started seeing that I could adjust these things, I could shift around till I was closer to what I wanted to be. I also realized that being an artist all my life, I could never hold an image in my mind. At least not since being a child. All my work came from technique rather then being able to picture something, much less hold a picture or a memory. I decided to see if I could adjust this. I worked on this for a little. I was able to make an image in my head, modify it and hold it. I was also able to zoom on parts of the image, and zoom back out keeping it the same as the first though. The wonderful thing about this is that I can still do it after the trip. It is not as clear as then, but I can still do it which has helped my life some.
Shortly after I started hearing my GF cursing playing video games downstairs. This was sort of distracting and negative, so I decided to move into my office. While coming to I realized she is the aspect of my life that conects me to the real world. Without her I may go so far to the other side I could not function on this side.
Once I went into the office, I put on a CD called Chakra Dance. I laid down on the bed in my office, and got under the covers, I was pretty cold at this point. And went into a new state. It was like being on the line of sleep and wake. I then attempted a OBE. For some reason I felt like I should, like I knew I could. I projected my 'self' from my body, up. I have had this feeling before but it was forced in the past (by something or someone). I began going into space. There were stars, and they seemed to be in a cyclinder shape. They were far apart, but looking from a distance from normal eyes it would look just like a picture of space but as I came closer I could see that sorta had a cylinder depth to it that I began to enter. As I entered I began to have insight. I realized that this was some sort of astral plane in space and a sort of 'Psychic network.' I could feel other conciousnesses present. No physical forms, just conciousness--communication to each other. It's sorta hard to explain. But here's the part that got me. As I got deeper, I heard a buzz. I felt a buzz. Not like anything I have ever experienced. It felt like I grabbed a live wire. It was not like hearing a sound in my head, but like hearing it live, and loud in my ears.
When the sound hit my body suffered a quick jerk a raised up and I immediately returned to my normal state. Almost like turning the whole trip off. This seemed to last a very short moment. As I pondered it things started returning to the mimosa state. I could not help but think how real that felt. It was unlike anything I had ever felt within before, it was so real. I almost wondered if the tampering I had done in my head earlier had short circuited something. It was so very electric. So as the state returned, I tried to return. I pushed and as I got to a simular point, I got a new sound and the same feeling. I can not describe the second sound other that I had never heard anything like it before. Then the journey was done. And I was in my normal state where I could see energy and a few other things. I tested a few of my tweeks (ability to hold an image) and still had it. I am still unaware of what I experienced while out there, but am hoping to someday find out what it was.
I plan another journey again soon, but next time I will go with a slightly larger dose.
It was around 1am when it was done, and I went to bed. I could not sleep and just pondered on the moment for a few then went to bed.
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