For some time now I have been taking 5-htp capsules, which also contain valerian, to help regulate my sleep and improve dreams. I haven't a problem with them until last Friday, an account I am about to reflect upon.
I usually would take about 250-300mg of 5htp (valerian content unknown to me at this time). At first I found the effects to be almost reminiscent of the spacey feeling produced while beginning to come up on shrooms. Each time I dosed myself with these pills, the spacey feeling was less and less apparent, until I felt no difference between this substance and straight sobriety. I dosed an average of 12 times, before the experience this writing will tell, and never dosed more than twice a week.
My room is filled with electronics (computer, tv, playstation, dvd, cd, mp3, gamecube, printer, satellite receiver box, and a vcr)
An hour after getting home from work. I am a little wired from all the coke I drank, while exhausted at the same time. I usually don't sleep well while in this condition.
I fell asleep about an hour after taking the pills. I mainly just watched TV and drank a coke before lying down in bed. I don't really remember drifting off to sleep. My last memory was looking at the clock, which read 12:15am.
Enter the dream:
I open my eyes and see my room exactly as I had before I closed them. I notice I feel a little spacey (my vision was similar to the way it is while I am on dxm), and decide to get up and get a glass of water. By the time I got to the door way of my room I realize that I am in a dream, and then, immediately, I am back in bed just opening my eyes. I realize that I just dreamed getting out of bed and walking towards the kitchen to get a drink of water, decide that I want to get up and see if I am still dreaming. I get as far as three steps before I realize I am once again dreaming and am immediately transported back to my bed, and the same events ensue with different results in when I realize I am dreaming.
I get stuck in this time loop about 50 time consecutively (or at least that is how it feels.). I often get pretty worked up when I am in a dream and cannot get out of it and have trouble realizing if I am dreaming or not, and this was no exception. A few times I plugged in what I thought to myself was a lamp with a weird face on it and a hookah mouth piece. I sucked from the mouth piece to take a hit of oxygen. I thought this would help me awaken, but it did nothing and I tried it during more than one time loop ( which could be because I have, lately, been smoking weed twice every week, on the days I go to my philosophy class. It seems to help me focus and contemplate things longer. I often look forward to doing my homework on these days as it seems less tedious and much more effort seems to be put towards it.).
Somewhat long pauses came in-between the time loops, sporadically. At once point I was trying to open packages which could not be opened, as once I ripped the wrappings off, new wrappings were already beneath the wrappings being removed ( I have been anxiously awaiting two different packages, one coming from the opposite side of the country, for about a week and a half.)
Suddenly I am completely in the dark, with no mental images other than darkness, and no sense of anything other than this extreme pulsing through out my head, eyes, and gums ( jaw clenching). This seems very painful and goes on for what seemed like a minute or two, but was probably much shorter in duration. I was able to jerk myself out of sleep, suddenly as the pulsating was becoming too much.
The awakening: 3:28am
I awoke somewhat shaken, sweaty, and with a kind of 'lost' spacey feeling. As I sat up in bed, I noticed my heart was beating somewhat quickly. I went downstairs, drank an entire bottle of water, threw off my pants and threw a very light blanket on my bed (after removing the heaver comforter I had been sleeping with).
I meditated by my bed for a few minutes, trying to calm down and think about what just happened. I then slept soundly until about 8am, went back to sleep until 11am and then finally got up at 12:07. I was expected at work by 2:00.
I was fine at work, except that at about the 6 hour mark I started to get pretty tired.
