Background:
I've taken Ritalin (orally) for what must be about ten years. I am sixteen now. It was supposed to be the miracle drug that would keep me on the fast track to a successful scholastic career, but it took me until only a few weeks ago that it wasn't really helping at all. I'm actually doing better (or at least I feel better, heh) without swallowing 40 mg every morning.
It would make me feel groggy and depressed all day, and leave me with no appetite. So I informed my parents that I was going to try not taking it for a while, just to see what happens. I immediately felt better. Like all the stress in my life had been lifted off my back. I knew that Ritalin was not the drug for me. I had always heard that Ritalin was a popular drug, but I never really knew why. I had heard that people liked to snort it, but I always assumed it gave them the same feeling it gave me when I swallowed it. Well after researching more about drugs (I've smoked Cannabis on a regular basis for a year or two. I've drunk alcohol probably once or twice a month for about two years. I've also tried Codeine (300mg on one occassion) and Valium (90 mg on one occassion)) I decided to try snorting some Ritalin. I have a bottle with 30 20mg pills left (after using 16 of them tonight). So I started with 46 of the original 60 that were prescribed.
Mindset:
I was in a pretty good mood. Nothing really bothering me. I was excited about an upcoming vacation, starting with a half day of school tomorrow. I wasn't really concerned about my mindset before the experience, and the decision to do take the Ritalin was spontaneous. Once I decided to do it about 15 minutes passed while I let the anticipation grow, and waited for my mom to go to her room for the night.
Setting:
It was at around 8:15 PM on a Tuesday (school night). I was alone in my house except for my mom who was in bed, reading but not asleep. I didn't let this worry me though because she rarely comes downstairs to the dining room, where this computer is. I would have done it in my room, where it's more comfortable, but as I said before, I didn't give much thought to how I felt at the time, or the setting in which it was to take place. I didn't give much thought to the time which was a little late considering I need to be up at 6:30 AM for school tomorrow, and I knew I wasn't going to feel tired for at least 6 hours.
Preperation:
I had relaxing music playing at a low volume just for background effect. I crushed 1 pill under a little salsa bowl. I decided to start with only one line because I didn't know if I would be able to handle the burn. I had wimped out the night before and didnt want to use more Ritalin than I could tolerate.
Experience:
+0:00 - I snorted the first line right off of the computer desk. It wasn't a huge line but I was surprised at how much I can get out of one 20mg pill. Seeing how I could tolerate the burn and terrible taste of the drip (the more I did the less these bothered me. Infact I've almost grown to like the burn and drip sensations that you get from snorting) I decided to do another line in the other nostril. The burn was especially bad since I had done it through both nostrils one right after another. I immediately felt my nasal passage clear up (I have a slight head cold), which made the rest of the lines easier.
+0:30 - I could definetely feel it by this point. I was filled with energy. I really wanted to interact with other people, which is the main reason I stayed at my computer, to chat with people on AIM Instant Messanger. At about this time my heart was beating noticibly faster and I felt slight euphoria.
+0:50 - A friend called me on my cellphone and we talked for a while about our plans for tomorrow, which ofcourse inovlve smoking weed and in my case, doing more Ritalin as well (this is part of the reason I didn't do more tonight). I'd say the conversation lasted about 15 minutes, and all the while I had to control the volume and speed of my talking (which was surprisingly hard to do and resulted in a low mumbling that sounded really weird) as not to upset my mom upstairs.
+1:20 - I bumped another two lines, and I began to feel even better and more energetic. I felt as if I was on top of the world. I had difficulty multitasking. For the most part my mind would stay focused on one thing, and one thing only. So it was hard to balance typing with talking. I would pause on the phone for sometimes up to a minute while I typed even though I was still in the middle of a sentence.
+1:50 - We got off the phone and I continued chatting on AIM. I was pretty wired by now. My ego was definetely inflated. I felt like I could do anything. I honestly felt that I was seeing life through a new pair of eyes. I was a new, more confident, and more cocky than I was before I took the first few lines (I am quite a egotistical person without Ritalin). By this point I had 14 conversations on AIM simultaneously. I seemed to Instant Message everyone online at the time, simply trying to strike up a chat with anyone who was willing. During this time I would make blunt, bold statements. I was definetely more honest about things with people.
+2:30 - It was at this time I did another two lines. The craving for more was fierce, and I gave into it. I was really, really amped up. I imagine this must be what methamphetimine is like in smaller doses, which is part of the reason I took so much. To get a pretty hardcore speedy feel with a less powerful drug. The need to interact with other people intensified as I got on the phone with another friend who decided to smoke some pot first to make the conversation interesting. Well, like the last friend I was on the phone with, we discussed our plans for tomorrow (both friends are involved), and about random stuff.
+2:15 - Took in two more lines while on still on the phone with my friend, and we kept talking for another 5 or so minutes before his girlfriend called. I then continued my conversations on AIM with just as many people as before. I had the urge to go out and do something but I couldn't because it was too late at night (10:15ish).
+2:45 - I did four lines this time instead of two, which really helped the high. I had been coming down a little bit earlier. Also, I must have been talking more than I thought I was, (either that or the drip did something to my voice) because my voice was (and still is) raspy and lower. You could even say it's harder to talk.
+3:15 - I snorted another two. It seems that I was quite addicted to it by this point, and even as I write this I want more. The high continued, although it was slightly less powerful than it had been earlier. I continued chatting online.
+3:45 - I start writing this experience report. The high was really dying down now. So I decide that in a few minutes I'll take the last two lines.
+4:00 - I did the last two lines of the night to make it 16 total. This gives me a feeling of slight euphoria similar to the first two, maybe a little bit more powerful. I also grow restless and walk around the house a bit. The urge for more is present.
+5:00 - I put away the Ritalin for the night and try to sit and relax. I have the feeling that I want to sleep but I know I won't be able to for a while still.
+6:45 - I'm still jittery, and awake (and still writing this report, the total time it took me: appox. 3 hours, LOL). God I feel worn out but still not tired. I think my body just hurts from sitting here so long. I still want to do more but not nearly as much as before. I'm getting lazier about writing this report than I was before, due to exhaustion.
NOTE/Overview/Observations:
Let me start by saying that I didn't know how much I was going to do in one night. All I can say is I hadn't planned on doing 16 lines (20 mg/1 pill per line). But I found that Ritalin is quite addictive when it's snorted. I kept trying to maintain the high (and push it further and further) by doing more and more until I finally decided to stop at 320 mg/16 lines/16 pills. Also as I write this I'm still pretty high. I feel a mild euphoria and my hands are shaking, like when I have too much caffeine in my system (I assume this happens with most stimulants). I'm writing this about 6 hours after I started taking the Ritalin and it seems like I might still be high for another hour or so. The urge to do more is strong since I still have 30 pills left but I'll resist the temptation so I can get at least a few hours sleep. Once again I was surprised to find Ritalin to be so addictive. Also, I'm not sure of the exact times in the experience log because like I said,I hadn't planned on doing the Ritalin and the idea of writing this report came about 1 hour after doing the last line.
Another thing... I am having trouble writing this report because I want it to be perfect, although I can tell it's full of grammatical errors and a lot of repetition, but that's just the way it is. I don't really know where to put this note/overview/observations section so I decided to put it at the end of the report. I also find myself going back to correct things by changing their tense or placement in the report. It also seems like this is taking a lot longer (and the report itself is a lot longer) than it should be. These effects I attribute to the Ritalin. I also noticed that I use parenthesis way too much, but I can't seem to find a way around them. As a final note (yeah right), during one of my corrections I deleted a large chunk of the Background section by accident. I don't remember what was there though.
Conclusion:
Do I really even need a conclusion? I seem to be stuck in a thought cycle. I just want to comment on how my writing skills are lacking when it comes to this experience report. But that's something I've said in the above paragraph (There I go again). I am pretty tired, but like I said several times before. I don't think I can fall asleep. All in all Ritalin is a good recreational drug, although I think I took too much. But, now I see what all the fuss is about with Ritalin. I guess (like I said before, AGAIN) I took a lot more than I should have.
Ritalin is a powerful drug. A lot more powerful than I would have expected. It's 3:15 AM now and I have to be up in 3 hours. Who knew it could be so powerful?
P.S. - I tried to make this report a free-flowing observation of the effects of Ritalin, but it turned into more of a report about a report. I'll leave it with that. Goodnight.
