Citation: New2x. "Fresh Air for Old Fart: experience with Ecstacy (ID 16517)". Erowid.org. Aug 4, 2002. erowid.org/exp/16517
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I first want to say that I recently turned 30 years old and I had yet to do X. To the young ones reading this thinking I'm an old fart, let me assure you that life goes on, yep, even at 30! I live in a metropolis where it's 'cool' to be single and 30, and the club scene is still going strong for twenty and thirty-somethings. I'd always wanted to do X, and when I hit 30 I decided this was the year to do it. I've had 2 experiences in about 2 months, both extremely different, which I'll share.
For starters, know that I've always loved dancing and have been to raves before (yeh, I was the one of the FEW who was not on any drug at raves). So I'm not new to the scene, just new to the drug. I had a chance to see Oakenfold one night and I was told if I was going to do X, this was the time. Unfortunately, my X-experienced friends were unable to go, but I really wanted to do this, and I was going to go there with some acquaintance friends of mine. I ended up meeting them there but they were not rolling, just sitting at the bar and drinking. Not quite what I was expecting, as I was told X was something you needed to do with friends (and one of these friend TOLD me I should do the X, so I ~thought~ they would be rolling too). While they were content to sit at the bar, once I was rolling I had to hit the dance floor, so I was pretty much by myself, at a club, doing my very first 'real' drug. Needless to say, I was very anxious about what was going to happen.
I took half a pill, waited about 40 minutes, and popped the 2nd half. I really felt nothing the first 40 minutes. I could tell ~something~ was coming on, but I didn't know what to expect, so I just popped the second half. I stood at the edge of the dance floor, drinking water and waiting for the drug to kick in. The first thing that hit me was the music. I just ~had~ to dance to it. While I was still a little unsure, I waited until the effects of the drug conquered my anxiety and I went to the dance floor and danced, danced, danced. I didn't need to be with friends - the music and I, and the dancers around me, were flooding me. I had a big grin on my face. I began dancing next to a very cute girl who appeared to be rolling, but I didn't know how to approach her. We were right next to each other, looking at each other, but I was afraid to respond. If I was NOT on X, I would have approached her - I'm not shy at all when it comes to talking with the opposite sex. But I didn't know what to do. Do you talk to people on X? How does this work?? This was the one thing I missed on my first experience - I didn't know how to react with the others who were rolling (who were easy to pick out, once I was rolling too). Now I know that people on X seem to be in their own special, friendly group. I laughed happily when I realized I finally understood what the deal was with the glow-sticks -- the lights were so vivid, so amazing! I would stand and just watch people play with their lights. I then noticed other 'rollers' who were touching and caressing each other. I really wanted to do this this with someone, but resolved to just rub my fingers together. I finally ran into 2 friends of mine by chance who were rolling as well, so I spent the rest of the night with them. But they were a couple, and after a few hours I let them go do their own thing -- I still just could not resist the urge to dance, dance, dance. I went home when the club closed, had no problems falling asleep, and the next day I felt tired, but fine. I think the pill was a little weak, which was good for my first time alone. The experience was great -- the feelings were so vibrant, I was one with the music. But I knew to truly experience X, you had to be with friends. About a month later, I had my 2nd experience, which was TOO MUCH and borderline dangerous, but still an incredible ride...
There were 4 of us - Two guys and two girls - a couple, myself and a dear friend of mine, a gal I've known since I was 23. Due to a problem with our supplier, we first ended up taking only 3/4 of a pill each. We waited a couple hours, trying to find clubs to go to (a rave we went to had terrible music, so we went down the street to a new club, which was dead, and we finally found a busy club that would cater to us). Pushing 2 hours after the first dose, the original source came through, and we all got another pill. I took a full pill this time, which brought me to 1.75 pills. The first dose had yet to kick in. I felt the familiar 'something is coming on' feeling, but I was not yet rolling.
When everything kicked in, we were rolling our asses off. I experienced all the side effects of X. It was TOO much. The first time I did it, I felt in control, just euphoric. THIS time, I felt like a zombie. My body was jello, I was moving in slow motion. It was hard to do basic things, like unwrap a piece of gum. It was hard to dance. However, the 'good' effects of X were there - my friends and I couldn't keep from touching each other -- our hands, our arms. This is what I was missing the first time. I kissed a girl for the first time on X, and was blown away by it. I kissed with my eyes closed, but I swear I could SEE the kiss going on in my mind. It was amazing. The lights were jittering around me, the glow-stick people were mesmerizing. There were a few people with flags, waving them around, which blew me out of the water. It was the most amazing visual thing I'd ever seen. I remember yelling, wide-eyed 'Look at those fucking flags!!!' The bad effects were kicking in too - we all had done too much; these were strong pills. The other guy and one of the girls vomited. I felt my eyes shaking rapidly. I could not focus on people - I didn't even get a good look at the girl I kissed - I just could not focus on her. I would be in conversation with people and would just zone out right in the middle of a word. There were times it seemed I would forget to breath. Occasionally I had to stop and take a deep breath. At times, I noticed my heart felt a little heavy, like my blood pressure or pulse were way up. The rolling was too much. I felt nauseous. If I did not continually chew gum, it seemed I would just freeze for a few seconds (or minutes?? Hard to tell), seemingly not breathing, not doing anything, until something snapped me out of it. I remember thinking that I could very well fall on the floor and pass out at any time. I understood how some people end up in the hospital from X; You CAN overdo it.
We rolled for over 8 hours, leaving the club at 10:30am out of sheer exhaustion. But we were still rolling when we got to my place. I had christmas lights on my ceiling from a recent party, and they were still jittering around like mad, telling me my roll was nowhere NEAR finished. I continued to roll until about noon, when I was finally able to sleep. My friend had a hard time and had the shakes all day (she was never able to get to sleep). We didn't eat at all that day. I still felt dizzy two days afterwards.
While some of the effects were awesome, like the enhanced physical sensation of touching others, and the amazing visual light show, the actual rolling was too much. I was not in control. I've read stories at this site where people pop multiple pills - 3,4,5, even more.. This just tells me these people are doing too much and do not understand how X works. I implore you to visit www.dancesafe.org and read how X works... You need to replace your serotonin levels between X use. Taking X every day will NOT work and will probably cause damage. Even every weekend can be too much. Without supplements to rebuild your serotonin levels, X can become dangerous if you overdo it.
I'm by NO MEANS an X expert. But I've had a normal, perhaps weak experience, and a way overdone experience. If I'd give any advice, I'd offer the following when you do X:
1) Do NOT overdo it. I will Never, NEVER, do 2 pills again in one night. If you are taking 2,3,4,5 or more pills at a time, this is UNHEALTHY. The feeling of X is incredible, absoultely, but you cannot keep popping pills hoping the effect will hit you. You have to know how X works. It's not the MDMA making you feel the way you do - it is your body's own serotonin being released. If you've burned it all up, you're only doing damage to your system if you keep filling it with MDMA. From NOW on, I will start with 1/2 a pill, and take the second half if necessary.
2) Drink water. Don't dehydrate yourself.
3) Go with friends. While I had a good time alone, I recognized my mistake. I'll never do X alone again.
4) Chew gum. One side effect is gritting your teeth, or clenching your jaws (there's a very disturbing story on this site about a girl breaking her teeth, she was clamping down so hard)... Continuously chewing gum will keep you from damaging yourself.
5) Have a great time. I find myself often thinking back to the great feeling of X, and honestly, I can't wait until I do it again. BUT, I'm keeping this in check, and I know that the longer I wait, the better it will be, because my serotonin will be back at 'normal' levels, and the MDMA will be ready to work. WAIT. I know, it's great. But just give yourself some breathing room and do it occasionally, and everything should be fine.
Sorry for going on so much. I hope that helped.
Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid.